Four Months

Today has been four months since the accident. In my mind it seems so much longer. Yesterday I was thinking about the night before the accident. We were all sitting in the living room and I was thinking to my self how nice it was to hear Josh and the older kids talking and laughing and the two younger kids were play nice. I was just sitting and watching and enjoying it all. I wonder if we will ever get there again. Life is very different for all of us, it has been an adjustment. It would seem that after this long that things should be getting back to normal. I think we will have to find a new normal, things are different now.

Josh has continued to make progress, he has started driving on his own this week. He went to the store and his work by himself. And today for the first time he is going to his PT and Chiropractor by himself. It was weird sending him off, I have faith he can do it. I will still need to go to some appointments because he has a hard time remembering things, but it is nice to be able to stay home today. The MRI of his back showed bulging discs, the Chiropractor is wanting to try traction and said he will know if it is working after 5 times. Today will be twice and they will start some PT just for his lower back. I really hope he gets some relief soon. We had an appt. with the Neuro therapist last night and he wants to see Josh again the first part of next week,. He said if he is doing well he wants to try a couple of hours at work on Wednesday and Thursday or Friday.  Kind of  a trial run to see how he does and then maybe to three times the next week. I know Josh is happy about that, but he is also nervous. He is afraid of all that he won't be able to do or remember. I think it will just take some time to adjust like everything else he has done so far. Wound care is doing well this week, last week it actually got worse. That was a bummer, but this week it is back to healing again. Dr. Booth said that if it doesn't get better soon he wants to open it up because tunnels have a hard time healing. Josh is hoping that it will just heal, he said he has been cut enough. After Monday he will be done with OT, they said he is ready and that everything else he can do on his own. There are still a lot of appointments, just when he graduates from one things we seem to add another. Maybe another month and things will slow down some. At this point even with still having some physical issues to deal with Josh is having a harder time with the emotional stuff. It is a lot harder for him to sort out the feelings and thoughts in his head than it is to deal with the limitations his body still has. The brain takes longer to heal than the body. It is hard sometimes how he is different. I know he is still healing and it takes time.

I have not had a chance to work on my project since we tore out the cement. I have been a little overwhelmed with it, at times I wonder what I was thinking. How is this ever going to get done, I seem to be lacking in every aspect of the whole darn thing. All I know is that I really want to add this space to our home, I just can't see three boys in the tiny bedroom that is there now. I am sure it has been done before but Brayd is going to be 15 soon and it is hard for ME to have him in a room with a 7 year old, I can't imagine adding a 2 year old to the mix. Pure kayos is what that will equal! At any rate why stop now, I will be out there with my shovel digging footings if you need me. I have to have faith that it will all work out one step at a time. Much love, Denise

Progress

A lot happened last week, Josh had his MRI, we don't have any results yet. He also took his driving test and passed! We are just waiting for the paper work to go through so he can start driving. His therapy is going well, his speech therapist recommended that he do one final testing and then he will be done with her. She said he is done well and that he will still continue to progress, he has the skills, the rest will just come with time. He also did some testing in PT and they are happy with his progress and they continue to work on his balance and strength. Things have not progressed much with wound care, they said that sometimes things will just stop healing and so they scrapped it out to see if that would get things moving again. We also met with the neuro therapist this week, it is good for Josh to talk to him, he makes sense of some of the things that Josh is feeling. He set a goal to spend a couple hours a couple of times per week doing something productive out in the shop or around the house so that he can prepare to go back to work. He needs to build up to it and prepare himself so that he knows he can tolerate it when he returns. He is getting stronger and he can use his left arm more every week. He also still gets worn out very quickly and needs to rest a lot. Looking forward to the results of the MRI so that we now what is causing his lower back pain and can get help with it. The first part of the week was very hard for Josh but his spirits have lifted and he is thinking positive again.

We will be heading to SLC again this weekend, my Grandpa passed away y this morning. He was the sweetest man ever, I will miss the twinkle in his eye and the bright smile of excitement he always had when we went to see him. He has missed my Grandma so much and I am happy he is with her again. How is it possible to be sad and happy at the same time. We knew it was coming but that really doesn't make it any easier. It will be nice to see all of my family, some who I haven't seen for a long time. I am a bit worried about Josh making the trip, the last time it was really bad for his back. He still can't sit for very long at one time. We will have to stop a lot, I don't want him hurting like before. Maybe they will figure out something with it soon, I will have to check on the MRI on Monday.

I am thankful for all of the help tearing out cement, it was a huge job. I never would have been able to get it all taken out and hauled away without my Dad, Brayd, Matt and Kyle. Thanks so much for all your help! Things will probably progress slow from here, I will try to be patient! It's ok I am hoping taxes go well for us this year, that would really help with my project. As long as we can get walls up and a roof on we can do other stuff here and there. Thanks again, much love to all, Denise

A day off

No appointments today! This week so far has been busy, at wound care they said that things are progressing, just slow. We will see the doc tomorrow and they may change things up on how they are caring for it. We also went to his regular doctor and he wants Josh to have another MRI on his lower back to check for reasons for his lower back pain. Sometimes it is so bad he can't sit at all for very long. He was not happy about another MRI, I am not telling him when it is again so he won't stress. He is also going to have his teeth checked out, he has been having pain in the front on top and bottom. Probably rattled them a bit when he fell. He also had a steroid shot in his shoulder to see if it would help with the pain there. He has been written off of work for another 4 weeks.  He has an appointment next week for his driving test, one step closer to going back to work. We have 5 appointments tomorrow! So far 4 has been our record, it is going to be a long day. Therapy is going well, he was so excited to show me how he can sit down on the floor and get back up without holding on to anything to get back up. He is still improving fast.

Today was busy even though we never left the house. I had Josh clean out his files and keep an eye on Asher while I demolished the sun room out back. If you have never seen our sun room it was not a small room. I had no idea what I was doing at first, I just started taking screws out. It really wasn't to bad, but I was grateful when Brayd came home from school and could help me finish up the last wall. Tomorrow we are going to take down the rest of the awning so that on Saturday we can tear up the cement, hoping to get my hands on a jack hammer. The reason I am doing all of this is I can no longer handle Brayd and Camden living in the same room, and Asher can only share with his sister so long. If we put another room on I can put the two smaller boys together and the older kids can have there own. If there wasn't such a huge age difference between the boys it might be easier for them to share. I have no idea how much things will cost but I figure that I can do almost anything and will have to so that we can save. When we talked about doing this it was before the accident and I thought we could do it together. I know he feels bad for me to do it and he can't help, he said today he wishes we could just hire it out. I am sure there are some things we will need help with, but I have to say even though I am in pain right now it was kind of fun today. When I want something done I will find a way, although I haven't found a way to move the hot tub by myself. If anyone would like to help it would be much appreciated. It is very heavy, and it needs a new home, but I just need it to the other side of the patio for now. It was good to focus my energy on tearing down the sun room today, I felt very productive. I am grateful for everyone who still reads to find out how Josh is doing, I try to write twice a week to keep the info going. I hope everyone has had a great start to 2012, much love, Denise